Sorry, brah, but you’re not the one

With societal mischief-makers like The Bachelor, Tinder, and even  messing up everything that was once pure and authentic about the sacred rituals of dating, how can we trust ourself to make the right decisions these days? Well, Ravijour – a Japanese lingerie manufacturer – is here to tell you that you no longer need to make that decision on your own.

Introducing the “True Love Tester”, an innovative new bra that incorporates state of the art technology that monitors your heart rate and vitals to ultimately evaluate whether or not you seem to be in a state of “true love”. How is the aforementioned information pertinent to a simple item of lingerie, you ask? The magic of it all is that if the bra does not determine the wearer to be experiencing signs of true love, then the clasp will not open, thus rendering the wearer’s cleavage captured as chastised hostages until further notice. Huzzah! Good bye, icky drunken hookups; hello, sweet, sweet, innocent love making (or fondling).

According to developers behind the True Love Tester’s technology, true love can be determined by carefully monitoring the person in question’s heart rate to determine whether or not raised levels of catecholamine are being experienced. For all of you non-chemistry majors and naively human people (like me) catecholamine is the chemical that is released throughout the body when a person is first experiencing “true love”, as they call it. Pretty cool stuff, huh? So the sensors in the bra do their thing and then transmit signals to an app available for all iOS 7-enabled devices and gives either a thumbs up or thumbs down to whether or not the wearer’s lovely lady lumps may be freed for some fun.

A release date has not yet been determined, much to the rest of the world’s chagrin; however you can watch the video below for a delightful demonstration! But, this leaves us with just one (minor) question… you know that feeling when you just want to get home and take your bra off? What happens if you don’t find true love? Perhaps one must also love thyself to wear this little gem? Hmm…sit on that one for a while Lemon Ladies.



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  • Reply February 1, 2014


    Does anyone else think this is totally ridiculous? It’s like a 21st century chastity belt. Not only is the science and logic behind it sketchy, but even if it actually worked, it assumes women can’t make their own choices.

  • Reply February 2, 2014

    Ali Vitali

    Grace, you definitely have a point; however, I’m gonna choose to view this bra as more of a gag gift that you’d give to your slightly promiscuous friend at her bachelorette party rather than strapping your chastity belt on and padlocking your sex life, as well as your right to choose.