Yeah it’s not a typo.  I haven’t been on a date in approximately 97 days.  That means the last time I was on an actual date I was wearing a puffer coat and boots and probably some other layering pieces that are as equally unsexy as the combination mentioned above.  If my memory serves me correctly there was also snow on the ground.  Not the worst conditions by any means, but certainly nothing like the joy of a springtime romance.

Couple Together

It may seem as, in fact, that I would be hopeless. 97 days is a long time. But I have quite the opposite feeling. You see the reason that it has been a wait is because I am finally deciding not to settle anymore for just anybody. The analytical data of my life experiences shows me that when it comes to love, romance and partnership one can almost never have it all. In fact almost any practical, sane person on the planet would advise you to learn to compromise, not be so picky and just suck it up and understand that settling doesn’t have to be so bad.

It always seems is if you have to choose.  He’s totally gorgeous and has great style, but treats you with little respect or conversely he treats you like a princess, but his kisses don’t get your heart pumping.  Maybe he has an amazing career, but no time for you.  So on and so forth, we all know where this is going.

Heart Valentine

After years of dating hits and misses I have adopted a new standard for looking for love, no settling. Here’s the formula:

Know what you are looking for. Perhaps a list of qualities from superficial to the really deeper things will help steer you. I like really gorgeous men. Modelesque gorgeous men with great individual style, and any type of accent, or maybe tattoos would not hurt either. These are always the types of guys I go for. Any person with common sense would tell me that this is the very reason I have had my heart broken so many times, implying that if I could just love a regular looking, perhaps even ugly, boring dude that I would somehow find blissful love. But how does that even work? This brings me to my next point.

Have faith that what you truly desire is out there. I know after time it seems as if the old clichés are true, and that giving up on your standards would just be preferable to spending one more Saturday night alone, which by the way is a great way to become more comfortable with your own skin, not such a bad thing really, but I digress. The Universe is kind, and really wants all of us to have exactly what we desire. Knowing every last detail of the kind of partner we are longing for. And if you have enough faith, enough vibrations of imagining what you want, it can’t be too long until The Universe sets up a serendipitous meeting, kind of like a romantic movie.

Last of all, and the most important, you have to believe in your worth. You have to know deep down in your soul, the purest part of who you are, that you are worth every bit of what you desire. This might be the toughest step, because your ego is going to fight you on this one every time. This is what our life experience is about, overcoming our lower defined selves and more connected with our true nature, our higher selves, our souls. What a beautiful way to cherish your absolute goodness than to see it reflected back to you from your beloved, the most perfect one for you.

Listen; if there is a woman out there who has George Clooney into true love and commitment then you know there has to be some truth to my advice. Just as I know that somewhere in this world there is a totally gorgeous man with a heart of gold, looking for a woman just like me, ready to sweep me off my feet and treat me with more love and respect than I have ever experienced before. I believe in Unicorns and I believe that when it comes to love and romance, you should never ever settle. Give it some thought. Have some practice dates. The more you experience what you do not want, the more you know what you do want.  From the lips of Journey’s Steve Perry, to your ears, “Don’t stop Believing.”



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  • Reply May 22, 2014

    Jamie W.B.

    Really? Try not having a boyfriend or a date since 2009. That’s right, 2009. I’ve had offers, but I refused every one of them. I was heartbroken and cheated on by two boyfriends in a row, and in 2009, I made the decision to not see anyone until I’m ready. Well, it’s been five years! Now, I don’t even know if I want a boyfriend ever.

  • Reply May 29, 2014


    Honey, 97 days is laughably nothing. Like seriously. IT IS NOTHING. If you’ve never been on a stretch that long before, you need to spend more time by yourself and live beyond the fantasy of a model-esque guy sweeping you off your feet.

  • Reply June 15, 2014

    Visnaya F.

    Oh boo hoo. 97 days? Give me a break. Try one year.