Every girl tends to have a fascination with pizza. And if you are anything like my friends and I, the word pizza is used in every conversation. The morning text, “Pizza for breakfast?” Even in yoga “During savasana all I thought about was pizza.” Or after the bar, “It’s pizza time!” Pizza is basically a staple in every female’s life. Who can turn down the comfort of carbs, the taste of cheese, and better yet – adventures in toppings.
{Image via Pop Sugar}
But the other day as I was in savasana, I came to the realization that pizza is comparable to every man out there. Think about it, you can classify the type of guy you’ve dated with different kinds of pizzas. Let’s investigate this a little further; we’re gonna take that pizza cutter and slice into the different personalities of the 20-something male with… pizza.
You may find this cheesy, but you’re intrigued… I know you are.
{Image via IMDB}
The Margherita Pizza: This is the basic, classic pizza. This is the pizza where you find comfort, and you know exactly what you’ll be getting when you order it. And even the next day, this pizza tastes delish. This is like the of all relationships (Gilmore Girls reference). He is perfect – so perfect sometimes that he becomes boring. He is the guy that you find yourself always going back to because you find comfort in him. He is nice and sweet, but not too far out of the norm.
The Deep Dish Pizza: “Roses are red, Violets are blue, Chicago deep dish pizza is deep, like my love is for you.” That’s right – this pizza represents the philosophical kind of guy. He is so emotionally everywhere that you really don’t know what’s going on in his head. He makes remarks that are so deep that you sometimes have to replay what he said in your head to make sure that he is even talking sense. Basically the Justin Bobby of pizzas. And after one slice… you’re over it.
Meat Lover’s : With prosciutto or sausage or pepperoni to bacon – every kind of meat that could be on this pizza is there and sometimes it’s a little overwhelming. I think it is self-explanatory what kind of guy this is: the meathead… go back to the Margherita!
The Surprise Crust: So here you are eating your pizza, and all of a sudden you bite into the crust and you find cheese or something inside the crust. You were not expecting this and you don’t know how you feel about it. While cheese is usually a good surprise in my book. this is the guy that basically has a secret life. He’s putting up a front until you do some advanced Internet recon and find out he’s 30 and lives with his parents. Or you find out he is married with kids. Now back to the Margherita…
Quattro Pizza: This is the pizza that has four different toppings that don’t blend well together. Each time you take a bite, the pizza tastes different because you can only get one of the toppings. This kind of guy is the guy where as soon as you think you know where you stand with him, he changes. He makes you feel insecure because you never know what he will be like the next day. You try this guy out because you think, why not? But really it is just an emotional roller coaster with this one. Girls, please for your own sanity, stick to one slice!
White Pizza: You read the description of the pizza: white pizza with Gorgonzola cheese, pears, honey, prosciutto and walnuts. And you think, what an odd combination and where is the sauce? You try out this pizza and you are so glad that you did! This is the kind of guy that you are unsure about, but you give him a chance and he proves that he is the right choice. He comes into your life to show you that you deserve the best, and sometimes change is good! This becomes a staple pizza, sorry Margherita.
Think about your favorite kind of pizza, what is it? Do you find yourself overwhelmed with all the pizza choices that you keep choosing the basic Margherita pizza? I dare you to be different, go explore! Who knows what can happen.
What’s your slice?
