Party of One? No Problem

Ever since I was little I have been an extreme extrovert. In kindergarten I used to have to be separated from the other kids during lunch time so I would stop talking and actually eat. Yeah, I’m THAT extroverted. That means that I’ve really never had to do anything on my own, and I realized about a year back that I intentionally didn’t do things if I didn’t have anyone to do them with.

Thinking about eating in a restaurant alone would give me anxiety, so I would just grab food to go (I’m on a first name basis with the people at Chipotle). I thought people might judge me for being alone and wonder where all my friends were. Going to see a movie by myself was absolutely out of the question. I would just simply wait until it came out on DVD (because the Hunger Games is just as good on a small TV right?).

After the realization that I was missing out on things I wanted to do because I was scared of doing them alone, I decided to put on my big girl panties and face my fears. The first time I ate in a restaurant alone I was a bundle of nerves. I barely looked up from my phone, and I ate my lunch in record time.

However, the important part was that I did it. I ate by myself, and I have to say I was very proud. And now, I eat by myself all the time – no problem!

I realize there are people who have no issue doing things by themselves, and some may actually prefer it. I just happen to be someone who had to work at getting comfortable with time alone in public. If you’re anything like me, these tips might help you get over your fear of doing things alone or another similar phobia:

·         Do things at your own pace. I just dove into eating by myself because I prefer the band aid method of doing things, but maybe that’s too fast for you. Try testing the waters by meeting friends, arriving early and grabbing a table before anyone gets there. Progress to spending more and more time at a restaurant alone, and eventually you’ll be eating by yourself [and enjoying it] in no time!

·         If you’re going to just go for it but are still anxious, bring something to do with you. I started out by bringing books and reading while I nommed. I also spent a lot of time texting my friends while I ate, so having your phone handy can be helpful at first. As I got more comfortable I realized that it was actually nice eating alone because I could just take my time and journal about all the things going on in my life.

·         Something that I have yet to do, but is on my list is to see a movie alone. I’ll share my game plan so we can try this method together. I’m going to purchase my ticket online so I can just skip the wait and avoid having to say I’m by myself. I’ll get a ticket for a matinee showing so I can save some bucks while also getting primo seats. I find that more people go to the movies at night, so this way there are less people to feel anxious around.

·         Traveling alone is something I have done and it’s quite an adrenaline rush. I was filled with a sense of excitement and nerves, but overall I felt accomplished. I was on a mission, and fears be damned, I was going to get where I wanted to go. Anytime I’m traveling alone, whether it be by train, plane, automobile or by foot, I always have my iPod handy so I can strut my way through the streets, get into my groove, and leave all my cares behind. Judge away people, because I feel FABULOUS!

Since I started challenging myself to face my fears, I’ve become more confident in who I am. I care less what others think about me; because I’m taking control of my life and doing things I want to do. I’ve become comfortable in my own skin, my likes, dislikes and interests.

So dear reader, my challenge to you this week is to go out and do something that scares you. Who knows, maybe you’ll feel fiercer after doing it, too!

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